The KnitOlympics are Here!!!!

Tonight the London Olympic Games officially begin with the opening ceremonies and I cannot wait!!! I absolutely love the Olympics – who doesn’t (and I wouldn’t trust them if they didn’t!) – and I love, love, love to watch the Olympics while I knit and sip, knit and sip.

So this year, I had the brilliant idea that I would make my own little Olympic Games right here in my living room. I have a lot of “wips” – works-in-progress, for you non-knitters – and I thought wouldn’t it be cool if I piled all those wips in one pile and for the duration of the Games knit nothing but items from that pile in an attempt to cross the finish line, as it were?

Great idea, right?

Let me tell you something. DO NOT go into every nook and corner of your house looking for every item with a pair of knitting needles attached unless you are prepared to face the fact that you, my dear, just might have a little addiction problem . . . .

Can you see the queen-sized bed under all those projects?

I am horrified by the size of my pile.

I can hear you laughing at me, not with me!!!!

God, what is in here? Basically, things that are as small as baby booties and as large as one of those circular sweaters. Several lace shawls and scarves. At least 3 orphan socks.  A Knitty.com fish hat I was supposed to have finished last year for community knitting project. Several baby garments. A felted bag my friends call “The Volkswagon” because of how big it is.

Sigh. Shame. Sigh. Pour. Sip. Better now.

But I’m going to do it! I am going to cross the finish line with as many of these damn things as I possible can over the course of the games.

So here are my (self-imposed) rules:

1. During the Olympics, I will start nothing new.

2. I will knit only items from this HORRENDOUSLY, EMBARRASINGLY HUGE MOUNTAIN OF STUFF.

3. My knitting Olympics will kick off at the same time the Opening Ceremonies begin in my time zone tonight. They end when the Olympic torch is extinguished at the end of the Games.

4. My knitting need not be limited to the times I am watching the Games (if I am in the car in the next three weeks, I can knit).

5. Some projects needs to be frogged, not finished (non-knitters, that means ripped out, as in ribbit, ribbit). Three frogged projects will equal one finished project (sound fair?)

Those are rules. What are the “medals”????

Bronze Medal – Complete 10 projects

Silver Medal – Complete 15 projects

Gold Medal – Complete 20 projects

I had planned to start the medal levels at 5 finished projects, but the size of this pile shamed me into upping the ante.

And, Vanna, would you show our lovely audience what the “medals” actually are?

At the end of the Games, I will buy myself a FABULOUS pair of shoes in the corresponding color of the medal level I achieve. (Secret – I don’t want a pair of gold shoes, but I sure would love a pair of silver sandals for our trip to Cancun just after the Games!)

Now, like any good athelete, I WANT SUPPORT! I WANT A CHEERING SECTION! I WANT ENCOURAGEMENT. So if you follow my blog over the next three weeks, where I’ll be posting the things I finish, let me hear from you.

And should you feel moved to join me in this little endeavor, there is nothing that makes the Games more interesting than a little competition!!! Let me hear from you!

About kjwinston

I am a freelance religion reporter living in the San Francisco Bay Area.
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21 Responses to The KnitOlympics are Here!!!!

  1. Jan says:

    OMG! Hysterical. I adore you, Kimberly…………and miss your wicked sense of humor.

  2. Rachelle says:

    OMG! LMAO!!

    I am so on board with this! I have already begun, tho. Just working on the knitted on border of MM’s Simple Triangle Shawl. Next is to finish my Flambe, then an old Summer Flies, and last but not least, the socks I started in your sock class I took months ago! I’ve already frogged one project. I know I won’t win any medals, but hey, support is support, right?

    • kjwinston says:

      Come on girl, I’ll take you on!!! YOU ARE GOING DOWN!!!!! My giant pile can kick your little pile’s asssssssss!

      • Rachelle says:

        True, but your knitting speed can kick my [slow] knitting speed’s ass as well! LOL! Neverthess, I’m so IN!

        There’s also this issue of how many conceived projects I have in my head…. Can I make them count somehow? Like if I start X number of conceived projects, it counts as one finished project? I know it’s sort of counter-productive in terms of the goal of not starting new projects, but these ideas take up a lot of brain space…. It counts, RIGHT??!!

  3. I am actually competing in the “special” knitolympics, wherein I shall butcher several on-going projects and at the end, buy a helmet so that I stop hurting myself when I fall down.

  4. Anne Arbor says:

    Ooh, I like this idea–given that I’m near the finish line on both a baby blanket and a gorgeous shawl in Malachite-colored Malabrigo Pashmina. And Sara’s two hats; that counts. But for inspiration, we need a video of Kimberly jogging slowly and holding a project aloft while the theme from “Chariots of Fire” blasts in the background.

  5. This is too funny. I really need to join you. Only I am afraid to put all of my UFOs in one place. Perhaps I can finish 2-3 projects.

    • kjwinston says:

      Come on, girl, we can do this!!!! Seriously, tho, I thought my pile would be half as big. I am absolutely mortified. i had friends over for the ceremonies and when I showed them my pile I swear to you they started planning an intervention. But then I sent each of them home with moebius scarved I had lying around. Yeah. That’s how bad my stash is. I had about 6 completed moebii just lying around!

  6. Ellen Keohane says:

    I think that your pile is not actually all that scary. I say this because my pile would require king-size bunk beds! I’m too afraid to pull out all my UFOs, so maybe I’ll just pull out “some” of them. Good luck to you and I look forward to seeing your inspiring progress!

  7. Jean Cannon says:

    Please consider me a cheerleader for the Kimberlympics. Go, girl!

  8. e1issa57 says:

    Sooo….. I have decided that rather than try to curb my addiction t buying yarns (after all…touching, smelling, seeing, fondling, etc. all of those WONDERFUL fibers is just toooo comforting)…..I will STOP purchasing NEEDLES! LOL. Even though I’ve got many, many, many needles of ALL shapes and sizes…..eventually, I will run out of needles and therefore will be unable to start any new projects until a set of appropriate size needles becomes available!

    GO FOR THE GOLD….and then…..buy the silver…. hmmmmm….I’m thinking that you can purchase one set of shoes as you pass each metal goal! :)

    • kjwinston says:

      That sounds like a good idea, she said doubtfully!

      BUT you have a point – I could buy some very CHEAP shoes as I head towards my goal, could I not??? The hard part will be if I DON’T hit a medal level keeping myself in line and NOT buying shoes. I know! If I don’t hit 10 projects to get even a bronze, I can console myself by BUYING MORE YARN!!!!

  9. e1issa57 says:

    Buy the yarn, find the needles and knit some shoes! LOL

    • e1issa57 says:

      or better yet….. how about “re-purposing” one of your works in progress….I bet you can find at least ONE of those WIPs that is in a color that is close to bronze, silver or gold! That way, you’ll be creating the “medal” while striving towards the NEXT medal! There are LOTS of “bootie and slipper” patterns around! LOL Just think….you’ll be the height of fashion wearing hand knit “shoes” on your trip! :)

  10. Pingback: California Craftini – At The California Wool and Fiber Festival | Craftini: My Daily Cocktail of Yarn, Beads and Paper

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